A Perilous Journey Read online

  “Go back to your platoon, Trooper Two-Five. Forget this incident ever occurred.”

  “Sir?”

  “I’ll speak with your mother in private. I think a word from me will be enough to bring her back to the path, don’t you?”

  Ohhh, the relief washes though me like a swollen river. The forgiveness of the Nation is truly immense.

  “Thank you, sir. Thank you so much. Thank you.”

  “You can fight on the Front with a clear conscience, trooper. Victory will be all the sweeter for you.”

  “Thank you,” is all I can say.

  I leave the office wanting to thank the desk clerk, but he’s not there, so I go out into the sunshine and see the world for what it is. A good place. I will fight with every ounce of body and soul to bring victory to the Nation and I can only pity those who leave the path.

  My cap…

  Damn, I’ve been so wound up, I’ve left it behind.

  I return to the waiting area. The Guardian is on the radiophone in his office.

  “Yes, I need you to arrange a swift execution as soon as the volunteers depart…”

  My heads spins. My heart thumps. I almost crumble. I have to get away from the building. I have to get to Ma! But I must also get that cap…

  The Guardian finishes his call and goes to the window. I count silently to thirty then I make a big noise of arriving.

  “Sorry, sir, I forgot my cap.”

  He turns, he turns, but only in my head. It’s not real. I’m not worth turning for.

  “Good luck on the Front, trooper.”

  And I’m away, cap in hand, hurrying.

  But as I reach Main Street, I wonder if I’m overlooking the facts. Ma called the Leader a liar and the Guardian has chosen to spare me any turmoil in order for me to fight unburdened on the Front.

  I try to get my thinking straight. I shouldn’t have told Dub’s grandpa. But I did and that woman overheard. She probably has little food or money, so I shouldn’t blame her for seeking a reward. It’s my fault, not hers. I’m the one with the big mouth. And talking in public about something so incredibly dangerous wasn’t my only mistake. Back when Ma said the word, I should have stepped forward. Even if the military man had beaten me to the ground, I should have challenged Ma. She’s my mother and I should have given her an opportunity to explain herself. The fact is I’ve failed us both – but maybe there’s still time to do something about it.

  I check my watch. There’s fifteen minutes until I’m due back at the town square – just enough time to tell Ma she’s about to be shot dead as an Enemy of the Nation. Then she can either explain herself to me or run for her life.

  4. Aboard

  BEN

  We’re in the next valley along from mine – six of us so-called volunteers on the back of the open-top truck, waiting in silence. We’ll double our number by the time we’ve made all the stops. Once we number twelve, I’m guessing we’ll have a chance of finding at least one genuine volunteer among us.

  You’d think we might have a lot to discuss on the truck, but it’s limited to a comment about how the air-filled tires make for a comfortable ride. It’s the seriousness of the situation, I suppose. It’s hard to discuss current issues and future hopes when the chances are against any of us making it back. That’s not pessimism. It’s just no one who’s gone to the Front has ever returned.

  Something catches my eye down the valley – a red-throated duck flying toward water. It’s good to see. Some folk talk about this part of the world once being without any kind of duck, but there are a few around nowadays. Not that I’ve ever caught or eaten one, but we live in hope.

  The truck’s engine judders to life, meaning our driver has spotted the two girls coming down the path. As they climb aboard, I smile at them. I reckon they’re my age – so not exactly who you want alongside you when you’re fighting on the Front. We had a good and powerful force of older regulars when the war began. Not anymore.

  The girls sit facing me. One of them is just my type. I like her face and her shape. I imagine us as the last two people alive on earth. And I imagine us sitting beside a fire. She kisses me like she’s hungry for me, which I like.

  The truck pulls away and I put a stop to pleasant thoughts. This girl will soon be dead.

  There are just two more valleys to visit and then we’ll be done. The last of them is where Kim, my wife, comes from. She’s still living there because the home I’m building for us and her parents is yet to be finished thanks to all my help being called into the army.

  I’m hoping Kim and me can be together at training camp, and that we might get to know each other. My gran arranged our marriage and I only saw Kim once before the wedding. I wish I could say I cherish the memories of our only night together, but it was embarrassing, awkward, and unsatisfactory all round. We stayed in my tiny room at Ma’s, but I don’t think our first and only attempt at a union was helped much by having thirty others staying overnight in the other two rooms and on the floor in the hall outside our room.

  I look again at the girl opposite me. There are no pleasant thoughts this time, which is right. We have no future.

  5. Run!

  JAY

  Approaching the house from the lane is not a good idea. Someone might see me and make a note of the time. If Ma decides to run, there’s no sense in the Town Guardian learning it was me who warned her five minutes after he issued the execution order. I’d become an Enemy of the Nation too. It would be me tied up in front of Essie.

  The long way round takes me via the small, rundown, weather-boarded homes of the south side. It’s a miserable route sprinkled with cussing agricultural workers waiting to be summoned to one of the farms. Some of the people here know I’m a pampered schoolgirl who’s about to train as a teacher, so it’s no place to hang around, even in an army uniform with a rifle.

  Reaching the fields this way, I’m soon west of our place with a good view of anything going on. As it is, the army car has gone.

  Ma’s surprised when I come in.

  “There’s a problem, Ma. I’m not sure how to explain it.”

  “It’s alright,” Ma says. “Most volunteers have second thoughts.”

  “It’s not that, Ma. It’s about telling the truth and…”

  “Just tell me the problem, Jay.”

  “You have to leave. I heard what you said about the Leader of the Nation.”

  She looks puzzled.

  “I came back. You were listening to the radio with someone from the army.”

  Ma’s face freezes in an expression halfway between astonishment and dread. “Who knows about this?”

  “Dub’s grandpa knows and so does a woman. I don’t know her name but she’s sure as hell nosy. And the Town Guardian knows too, Ma. He’s going to have you executed.”

  She slaps me. Hard. The side of my head stings like it’s on fire. I try not to show any pain as I don’t wish to disgrace the uniform, but it’s not easy. Then Ma looks at me with the saddest eyes.

  “I’m sorry, Jay. That’s not how I want you to remember me.”

  “I’m sorry, too, Ma.”

  She tries to smile.

  “Who were you with?” I ask.

  “You didn’t see?”

  “Only a uniform.”

  “Then it’s best you don’t know.”

  This seems good advice, but I’m still confused.

  “Why did you say it, Ma? Why did you say that word about the Leader of the Nation?”

  Ma goes over to the window and looks out over our farmland. It’s not been easy since Pa died and Ax went off to war.

  “You’ve heard the stories about the troops that leave this place?”

  “I ignore them, Ma. Some people like to make up stuff so that other people will listen to them.”

  “The stories are true.”

  I’m surprised to hear Ma say that. “How can you know?”

  “You know the forest over the river?”

  It’s a silly
question. “I’ve been up there a thousand times, Ma.”

  “Recently?”

  “No, not recently.”

  “You remember Kar-Vee? He lives in the forest over the river.”

  “Really?” I’m surprised. Kar was one of the bullying older boys who left with the 3rd Forbearance Volunteers.

  “He’s not alone,” Ma says.

  “Is Ax there?”

  “I don’t know where your brother is, Jay. But Kar came back from the war a different person. He’s not the boy you knew. He’s changed. I’m worried you’ll change in the same way.”

  I don’t understand. “How do you mean, changed? Has he lost a leg or something?”

  “It’s not physical, Jay. He saw things. Terrible things. If he came back to town, he’d be arrested and executed. They wouldn’t allow him to tell others what he’s seen. You mentioned the truth? They prefer it buried.”

  “How do you know all this?”

  “If they knew we were having this talk, they’d kill us both and your brother would not live through the war. They’d make sure of that.”

  “I wish you wouldn’t talk like this, Ma. You sound like the people we’re supposed to hate.”

  “It’s the truth, Jay. The real truth about the Nation.”

  “I can’t accept that.”

  “You’re one of the brightest girls in school, but you deserve to learn the truth before you start teaching their lies. The Nation isn’t what you think it is.”

  Ma stops. She’s heard something. We both have.

  She checks the other window, the one that overlooks the dirt drive between here and the road.

  “It’s the police,” she says. “You’d better go.”

  I stare at her. The Town Guardian’s orders are being carried out. They’ll hold Ma at the police station until the 4th Forbearance Volunteers have left. Then she’ll be shot in front of the townsfolk as a warning.

  “You have to leave, Ma.”

  “Don’t worry about me. I’ll hide until they’ve gone. Then I’ll find somewhere to go.”

  “Where?”

  “Just get yourself back. The Nation is about to fall. Be strong. Survive.”

  I don’t know what to say or do.

  “Run!” Ma yells. And so I do. “And don’t trust them!” she calls. And then she yells, “I love you, Jay. I’m sorry I hurt you!”

  And I’m away, through the yard, over the fence, and across the west field, taking the long way round. I’m aware of the police car outside the house. Ma’s running up toward Riverside Ridge. I don’t know what will happen to her or to me. I just run. And run.

  “Hey!” someone yells.

  I’m being chased! I run faster and grip my rifle. What will I do if I’m caught? I can’t think straight and I’m scared I’ll make a bad choice and shoot someone… and I’m scared I’ll be shot with Ma while Ax is betrayed to the enemy… and… I’m running so fast, I don’t think I’m being followed any more. I glance back and it’s true. I’m okay. I have a chance of getting out of this mess. And if I’m free then there’s hope I can do something to help my family. Especially as I haven’t heard any shots. That means Ma might have escaped.

  The long way round brings me back into the south side. I duck behind a broken slat fence and move bent double behind a line of threadbare washing. My lungs are glad of the rest but my mind is still racing.

  The Nation is about to fall.

  I check the way ahead. There’s a woman hand-weaving something colorful on her back porch, but she facing away from me. I run again. Down an alley, over a low fence, through some bushes.

  “Hey!”

  The shout is from a log cabin but I keep going, over another fence and into a road.

  “Whoa!” I’m almost run down by a motorcycle messenger heading west out of town. He rasps his horn but he doesn’t stop. Despite my situation, I can’t help but watch him go. It’s only the third motorcycle I’ve ever seen. I wish I had one to get myself elsewhere fast. In fact, I’d settle for a bicycle, but they’re only for the wealthy and certain officials, so I get my mind back to using my legs.

  I dart across the road into an alley between a house and a store… and I turn into a quiet back street. Now I can get across to the town square without having to use Main Street. I only need to…

  Mr Nine-Zero.

  Has he seen me? I slow to a stroll, hoping he hasn’t. I truly despise this man. He must be sixty but he won’t quieten down. Some say his greed keeps him young. Last year, he sought permission to challenge Ma for ownership of the farm. He did this by promising the Town Official a 30% increase in crops. It’s crazy. How can anyone give crop figures on a piece of paper? How does that take account of sun, wind, and rain? Ma now has to break records or lose the farm because Mr Nine-Zero once designed a poster of the Leader of the Nation looking down on a town like a loving parent. Ever since that poster featured in an official news film, everyone has been keen to assist him in case he’s in touch with the Leader. To me, he’s nothing but a despicable bully. Mr Nine-Zero, that is, not the Leader.

  Painfully, it all becomes clear. With Ma either dead or a runaway criminal, Mr Nine-Zero will take our farm.

  He’s seen me.

  “Well, well, one of our brave volunteers.”

  I can’t help noticing his clothes. How can he be wearing a bright new knitted pullover when wool is almost impossible to come by? And I’m guessing he bought those shiny new shoes long before the old ones came close to wearing out.

  “I’m late for a parade,” I say. “The Leader of the Nation is coming.”

  “I know that, girl. I knew that before you or anyone else. Several days ago, in fact. Obviously, I was sworn to secrecy. It’s a matter of national security, you know.”

  I don’t believe him. Why would the Leader of the Nation contact someone who created a poster a few years ago? I do respect the service Mr Nine-Zero did, and I’ve seen the official letter of thanks he keeps in his front window, but I wish he were an Enemy of the Nation so that Essie could shoot him dead.

  “I’d love to talk,” I say, “but military matters must come first.”

  And I’m away.

  I reach the square where a thousand townsfolk fill every vantage point. I guess everything looks normal for a town that’s about to receive a first-ever visit from the Leader. The volunteers stand in a nervous group while the regular army personnel stand apart having their own conversations. I quickly take my place, breathing heavily and sweating, and not knowing Ma’s fate.

  “Into ranks now,” the sergeant says, nudging a young trooper with his baton. “Try not to fall over each other.”

  As we form into three lines, Dub catches my eye. I don’t care that he ate my meat and potato pat. Things have moved on from that being even remotely important.

  But he’s in my ear. “Heard the latest? That we’re a suicide squad?”

  I can’t take any of this in, not from someone who had to be strongly urged into becoming a volunteer.

  “Are you deaf?” he says. “Some are saying we’ll do a week at training camp then be sent on a one-way mission.”

  He can’t be right. I can’t be part of a suicide squad. I have to survive the war so I can reclaim our farm from Mr Nine-Zero and find out what’s happened to Ma.

  “Maybe that’s what happened to your brother,” Dub says.

  “What?” Now Ax’s disappearance is rushing into my head. I can’t deal with it. It’s all too much.

  “Ten-shun!” the sergeant barks – and we snap to attention as best we can.

  6. Families

  BEN

  Kim is sitting opposite me on the truck, but she’s not looking at me. We said a brief hello as she climbed aboard, but I didn’t get a sense of anything special between us. I know I should try harder, because beyond our marriage she’s family of a kind – my gran’s brother’s grand-daughter. Our valley has shown promising signs over recent years, especially with fish, so Kim’s side of the family is hoping
to slowly move themselves away from their present situation. There’s a definite sense of business about it.

  It’s strange seeing Kim sitting beside the other girl, whose name I don’t know. Despite the shadow of death hanging over us, certain thoughts surface once again. To hell with it, why shouldn’t I enjoy some pleasant thoughts about this other girl before we both die? Who will ever know? It’s not like she can read my mind.

  Then I stop the thoughts. Even with desire running free in my blood, I know it’s not right. My only priority is to stay alive.

  Besides, some people can read minds.

  Empaths.

  One read Pa’s mind and it led to him taking his own life.

  I think I hate empaths more than I hate the enemy we’re meant to be fighting.

  This girl opposite me though. She’s no empath. She doesn’t have that… intensity.

  7. The Enemy in Me

  JAY

  Colonel Five-Five talks while I try to take in his wise words. He’s an important man, the kind who would ride a horse, had all the horses not be eaten during the last famine.

  I don’t take in his wise words though. My head is too full of Ma running across the shallow ford to the forest chased by a police officer with a gun.

  A drop of perspiration rolls down my temple, down my neck, and under my collar. It seems I’ve been standing here for too long. If I don’t move soon I’ll faint. If only I could go to the police station and see if they captured Ma.

  It used to be so clear to me. My schoolteacher said an Enemy of the Nation has only one function: to weaken the Nation in any way possible. This is why we must be ever vigilant. A weak Nation would fall prey to the diabolical evil of the outside. That’s why those who spread poison must be executed. Otherwise, we’d soon be at the mercy of our enemy – which according to my teacher means no mercy at all.

  But what about me? I don’t want to weaken the Nation. I want to fight for our values. I want to teach others everything I’ve learned. Am I now an Enemy of the Nation because I warned Ma? It’s not like she marched into the town square declaring her views. She kept her opinion private. How is that helping the enemy?